There is also something about hanging out with your best friend. Dave Underwood is the man. He was a best man at my wedding, and we have stayed friends over the years even though there has been many miles between us. If you don’t have a close friend, I suggest you get one. You may only get 1 in this life.

Dave and his wife, (Who is really sweet) She reminds me of Stacia… just had a baby boy. And he is amazing. But it was really crazy for me to see a little baby and think about the fact that we are having our baby in just a few short weeks. I had forgotten how little Jathen was and how cute he was. It’s just crazy to think about having our second child.

I am excited though, I can’t wait to see how Brady David Ellington is going to act and what he is going to look like. (Hopefully me!)

I just love living life. Its hard and their are many obstacles, but I love the challenge.

Moving Forward,

Caleb

The thing about Tony was that he did look a little depressed.  He looked down when he talked, he wouldnt really look me in the eye.  But I never really thought about it…I mean who does?

Well, on Monday Tony killed himself.  He committed suicide.  I am saddened.  When I told Stacia, she wept.

I have so many questions right now and so many feelings.

First of all I am angry.  Angry at God and angry at myself.  I’m angry at God because I wish he would of said something to me like, “Caleb, ask him if everything is ok,” or “Caleb, why don’t you encourage him today.” But I never heard that.  Maybe God did say that and I didnt hear him.

I’m angry at myself because I didnt just do it anyways.  Who says that God has to prompt me every time? Isn’t my job as a Christian to do that anyway?  Aren’t I commanded to love my neighbor, to help the man who is down?  Why am I not sensitive enough to the Holy Spirit?  Why didn’t I help him, Why didnt I say anything. Man, that pisses me off. I mean this guy is probably in Hell.  That didn’t have to happen.

He’s gone now…and there is nothing I can do about it.

God, help me to see the people who are hurting.

God, give me discernment.

God, give me wisdom.

All this to help those who are hurting.

That is the type of people that I want to help.  As a Pastor in a church, which I was… its easy to get use to helping the people who are already christians…to focus on them and their problems.

Trust me, their problems and my problems are far from what this guys was.

One of the best sermons that I have ever heard talked about how Jesus is 99% focused on the lost…and 1% focused on us.  In other words, Jesus came to reach the lost, the hurting, the sick.  In God’s eyes, if we are christians now, we are none of these.

God, help me to be focused on these.

I preached one time on this…www.nextlevelchurch.com  then go to messages…its called “Frogger”

God help me to Cross the Divide.

Oh how, he dreams to be a bird swooping down through the breeze

Till one day, He caught this big o’ wave up onto the beach

Now the fish is dead you see, cause fish should know to stay down in the sea.

But oh God, under the weight of life it seems brighter on the other side.

Story of this man who decided not to breath

Turned red then purple so colorful indeed

No matter how his friends begged and pleaded he would not concede

Now the man is dead you see, cause every man should know ya got to breath

But oh God, under the weight of life, it seems brighter on the other side.

…DMB

Stacia and I were visiting my grandma 2 days ago and while we were up there Jathen was just sitting on the couch, doing absolutely nothing.  He looked tired, drained and of course sick.  I said, “Jathen, do you want some water…No, he replied”  Then I prayed for him, I asked that Jesus would heal his body and then I said, “Amen”.  Then Jathen repeated me and said, “Amen” as well.

Right then it started, he began to shake, his eyes rolled back in the back of his head, his lips turned blue, he was foaming at the mouth and he was completely unconscious…I thought he was dead.  It scared me so much, I started to pray, and cry and the same time.  Stacia called 911 and I began to give him mouth to mouth, and press on his tiny heart.  I didnt know what to do, I didnt know if he was breathing or not, I was freaking out.

Well the paramedics came and took him to the hospital, Jathen had a seizure, which now I know is somewhat common in little children when then get a real high temperature…His was 104.7.

He is doing fine now…

I never knew how much I loved my son until that moment.  I never knew that I had the capacity to love that much.  Every emotion came to the surface.  Love, anger, sadness, fear…it was one of the most emotional days of my life.

I now know what it is like to be a parent…truly!

October 1st 2007…  the scariest day of my life.

Have you ever been so bored that you visit the same 5 websites over and over and over just hoping there will be something different on them to read?         …I have

Have you ever been without a job for 2 months straight and you thought it would be nice but now you realize why your suppose to work in this life?             …I have

Have you ever almost just laughed at your existence and said, “Is this really what I am doing?”         …I have

Have you ever been at home so much with your family that you have said, “No wonder the man is suppose to work and the wife is suppose to say home with the kids?”      …I have

(Disclaimer:  If your a man and your wife works and you stay at home…    actually… nevermind….get a job.)

(Another Disclaimer:  I love my wife, I love my son, its just a lot. Thats why God gave women an extra helping of patience.)

Have you ever wrote something and hoped your wife would never read it?    ….I have   Ha Ha

Have you ever been home so much that the only thing that is  exciting to watch during the day is your weight?    …I have

Have you ever  just sat around so much that you started to wonder if you were gay?     …I HAVEN’T

But if you answered “I have” To the last one please call…

1-800-NOT-SURE

There are people standing by to help you.

I guess I’m just at a weird time in my life. I’m asking a lot of questions, asking God a lot of questions.  Its all depressing, sad and a little comical at the same time.

I just often say, “Seriously God…are you kidding me”

Anyway….There are time when you just have to laugh.

If your life sucks right now….Go to a funny movie, fart in an elevator and watch people look around and cover their nose.  Just smile.

Caleb

Well, thats what about 70,000 people were yelling as my best friend Dave Underwood and I were tailgating at Notre Dame Stadium on Saturday.

We yelled before the game, during the 1st quarter and a little in the second quarter. We yelled for Notre Dame football, we cheered them on.

Then in the 3rd quarter I think I actually shed a tear or two, I mean this is the opening game, the first event on a season of hope. But on this Saturday there would be no cheering for Notre Dame, not a single rushing yard…are you kidding me. I seriously think I could have gained at least 1 yard.

What a disappointing day, I just hope the bleeding stops.

I hate being disappointed, it is like someone stole something from me. I mean, Notre Dame stole my joy on Saturday, they took something that didnt belong to them.

I feel like people do this too don’t they?. Sometimes people in our lives steal stuff from us. Our innocence, our joy, our love…its like they rip it right away from us…its not fair is it?

But I realized something today…My hope for Notre Dame this Saturday will be just as high, my love has not changed, I will still wake up, put on my Notre Dame underwear, put on my Notre Dame hat, and watch the game with a great expectation that they are not going to let me down…I believe in them…no matter how bad they let me down.

Its too bad we cant treat people like this all the time. Someone lets us down and we have lost hope in them, we cant trust them, they are no longer any use to us.

Has anyone ever done that to you?

Have you ever done that to anyone else?

To the first person I say, “Don’t let them affect you, they don’t know what God know about you!”

To the second person I say, “Never stop believing in people, cause you don’t know what God knows!”

God help me to always believe in people, to never give up on anyone!

When Jathen was over there today he was throwing apples through the fence to the horses.  Well as he threw one apple somehow his finger nail got ripped off his finger.  Not just part of his finger nail but the whole thing.

So of course he began to wail, (I would be screaming if this happened to me as well) I mean can you imagine, your entire nail being ripped off your finger…OUCH!!

So we brought him back, my dad of course felt horrible, my mom almost fainted, I’m angry, Stacia is calm like normal, and Jathen is…well, let me just say he is a bigger man than me.

So the only thing that would calm Jathen down was a shot of whiskey…I’ve never seen him laugh so much…(This of course is a joke)  Whiskey is what I call his Tylenol.

As I thought about this today I just couldn’t help but think how every kid has to endure pain. Every little one goes through things in life where they must endure the pains that happen to them all to often.

1 Peter 2:19-23 says…

¹⁹For it is to your credit if, being aware of God, you endure pain while suffering unjustly. ²⁰If you endure when you are beaten for doing wrong, where is the credit in that? But if you endure when you do right and suffer for it, you have God’s approval. ²¹For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you should follow in his steps.
²²‘He committed no sin,
and no deceit was found in his mouth.’
²³When he was abused, he did not return abuse; when he suffered, he did not threaten; but he entrusted himself to the one who judges justly.

You know what I realized today?  I usually run from pain.  I don’t want to endure anything.  Seriously, who wants to endure pain and go through anything painful in their life?

This verse is talking about doing the right thing in life and then having to deal with the pain that comes when we suffer for doing whats right.  I think this verse has a lot to do with our integrity as well.

Its easy to do the wrong thing isn’t it?

Its easy to not do whats right so that we wont have to endure pain.

Its easy to forget what Christ did for us on the cross.

How much are we willing to endure pain for our Savior?

How much are we willing to endure pain for our family?

At what lengths will we go to in order to do whats right?

I believe suffering is part of the Christian faith, its kinda like prayer, fasting and living our lives serving others…its just something that we can expect.

So I encourage all of you…don’t run from the pain, press into it, find out what God wants to teach you…Endure it for Him!

I would love to hear how God has been teaching you to endure in your own life….just leave a comment!

Caleb

As Stacia and I have discussed the churches we went to, I found myself comparing the churches…as anyone would.  I found myself saying things like…”This church is better than that church.”  But according to who? According to me?  Who am I to say that one church is better than another church?

Does God really think some churches are better than other churches?

Which Church would Jesus Go to?

The one that is focused on children?

The one that is focused on discipleship?

The one that is focused on Missions?

The one that is focused on the Non-Believers?

Isn’t that weird to think about? That Jesus would have to pick one?

Or, what if all the churches served a purpose?  That none were actually better than one another, some just served a different purpose in the Kingdom of God.

I think I used to think that my church was the best church.   That’s awfully prideful of me.  When God is using thousands of churches to fulfill his plan on the earth.

Yes…even the church that was in Little House on the Prairie. It may not have had all the bells and whistles, but it served a purpose.  The purpose of bringing believers together to fellowship, pray, and to seek the Lord.

It’s easy for me to start to get Prideful and to begin to think that one church is better than another…

I think its all about going were God has called you to go…

God humble me.

This verse is full of wisdom.  The Apostle Peter tells us to clothe ourselves with humility. In other words, this is something that we have to do every single day.  Just as we put on a jacket or a pair of pants, we have to consciously  put on humility in our lives.

Humility is not something that you attain or something that you can achieve, it is something that we must think about every single day, something that we must ask God to help us with often.

The verse goes on to say that God opposes the proud.  Do you realize what this means?  This actually means that God is against those who are proud, God is our opponent.  He is on the other side of the boxing ring, the other side of the football field, God is about stopping us from excelling when we are proud.

As I was reading this something I believe powerful happened in my life.  I realized that when I feel like my prayers are hitting the ceiling, or when it feels like the world is against me, maybe it is because there is pride in my life.

Am I too proud to listen to the advice of others?

Am I too proud to serve somewhere?

Am I too proud to do something that is not the typical manly duty?

Am I proud because of what I have accomplished?

Am I too proud where now I view that some people are now beneath me?

Am I too proud to take time out of my day to help the lesser fortunate?

This brings to my mind the Samaritan man who was left in the street after being beaten and robbed. Some did not help him because of pride.  It’s a sad day when we are too proud to help someone, or when we have been called to “higher duties”

God, may I never be to proud to help you…because it was you on the road that needed help!

You know what…I have a lot of work to do…

God help me to not be so proud.

I’m sorry.

Humble me.

So as we were walking, Duke was walking along side of us and he was picking up everything in sight, and everything that intrigued him.  He picked up sticks, rocks, and leaves.

As we were about half-way home he stopped and looked into the mailbox that was for the newspaper, and there he saw something that intrigued him…a hornet’s nest.  So he proceeded to grab the nest, and the hornet’s did what God created them to do…they stung him on the hand.  He cried.  I think I would have cried.

The funny thing is that now when we ask him, “Duke, what does a bee do?” He replies, “Bzzzzzzzzzz…Ouch”  And then he proceeds to pinch himself.  It’s really funny.

But as I was thinking about this today, It came to my mind that there are so many intriguing things out there in the world. So many things that look like fun, or that look and seem like it might be a good move to make.  So many things that grab our attention, and our natural instinct (just like Duke’s) is to gravitate towards those things, to reach out to them, and to investigate.

Here is what I want to to do in my life.  I want to ask myself a few questions.

1. The things in my life that are intriguing, are they Godly?

2. The things in my life that grab my attention, are they holy?

3. The things that I want to reach out and grab, are they beneficial to me and my family?

Not all things are bad, just not all things are beneficial.  (yeah, its in the bible)

I sometimes like cheesy one liners that people use, I think they are funny.  So I will use one here.

“So don’t get stung by the things in life that are vying for your attention.”

Told you it was cheesy!

Peace and Love,

Caleb